The Narratives – Mohamed Miah

Mohamed Miah|The Narratives

It feels like being picked for a team during playtime at school. You stand there waiting, hoping your name gets called, trying not to show that you care, but you do. That same feeling has a strange way of coming back when you’re looking for work.

Without realising it, your mind starts going there. Self-worth. Validation. You begin to question yourself in ways you didn’t before. Am I actually good enough, or have I just been getting by? Am I a pretender, or can I really bring something to the table?

I did not come from a clear path. There was no roadmap, no guidance from parents or family on careers or direction. It was just me figuring things out as I went along, learning the hard way and making sense of things through experience rather than instruction.

But I worked. Long hours, consistent effort. I built something from that. No university degree, but experience that can sit comfortably in any room with those who have one. I made sure bills were paid, food was on the table, and things were steady. That gave me something I did not fully appreciate at the time — security. Not perfect, but enough to feel grounded.

Now that has been shaken.

There is something sitting there now that was not there before. A small seed of doubt. An inkling of fear that starts in the pit of your stomach and slowly rises. What if I cannot find what I am looking for? What if things do not land the way I expect them to? Do I go backwards, or do I keep pushing forward no matter how long it takes?

Because I know one thing about myself. I can work. I can push. I can get through things. That has never really been the issue.

But I also know this is not just about effort. There is something else in it, something beyond control.

And that is where the real test is. Not just in trying, but in turning back to Allah and asking for the strength to keep going.

Because I can do it. I believe that.

But I also know I need His help to be able to do it.

That is where I am right now.